Wednesday, August 22, 2007
You bastards
You complete and utter bastards. I slave over a hot keyboard and not one comment! Not one! After all that hate mail I got you would have thought some one would have encouraged me a little, I'm shattered. I hope you're happy guys. What do you have to say for yourselves? No presents for you lot then
Friday, August 17, 2007
Stupid dumbness and how I'm an angsty teenager
ADVANCE WARNING: THIS DOES NOT FOLLOW ANY ORDER; I APOLOGISE IF IT MAKES NO SENSE
It just feels like you can't understand people (obviously, I can't speak German), maybe you need to be born and raised to actually understand where all these different people are coming from. The expats, the experts are patronising, along with the passport stamp collectors. They are obviously holding the knowledge of the country in question, but even then they're not involved, they seem more like long term lodgers. EX (out of) and PATRIA (homeland) is the term they themselves choose, so they are not part of the community are they? It still identifies you as a foreigner, an outsider, a gai-jin.
It's that feeling of helpless angst that's the worst. Is it better to just not care? You ask with so little tact, you're an embarrassment because of this, so HOW do you learn? All I want is to learn which in itself is offensive. A white middle-class Australian has no concept of, I want to say culture. That's it, Australia has no culture of it's own. That bullshit of "multiculturalism" is a joke, it's a miniature less overt Balkans (again, what do I know actually fucking know about the Balkans?) of cultures living in one area, where the immigrants' cultures are watered down by each successive generation so that eventually their children are stuck with the listless masses in an angst ridden limbo where they no longer know who they are. This is compounded in the teenage years, but one day you leave that, sure in your cultural identity. But identity of fucking what?
Laid back and relaxed are labels for ignorance and most importantly apathy. I'm feeling like I believe in nothing, fundamentally. Not as in a vacuum of cultures but indeed the complete opposite; I am bombarded by examples of life, of cultures, of circumstances but I feel nothing for them. I can't feel authentically because I don't understand their context. Do we need some form of conflict to shape our identity? For fuck sake, we are at war right now, but the real effect doesn't reach our shores. In a very self-absorbed way, I admire the modern martyr in that they at least believe in SOMETHING (For the record I'm not just talking about Islam instigated attacks on the west). Regardless of whether their causes are admirable, well founded or justified; it's the act itself of committing to a cause to that extent I respect and search for (though I would not go so far as to say that they are selfless acts, I think the opposite would be overwhelmingly true)
But how self indulgent is that?! People have to die so that I grow a little bit as a person? Please. What is the alternative? Is there an alternative? It seems that identities are fertilised in the blood spilt in this search/clash of identities. What do I do? Read literature and travel western countries?
We live in a civilisation where the youth are promoted as 'the most important resource' which breeds self-absorbed, self-indulgent, shit head little 'individuals'. Well, civilisations rise and fall, their demise begins as they start to slip into indulgence and decadence. The Western Empire is on it's slide into destruction. The Roman Empire eventually met it's end as it became inundated by immigrants and the original citizens stopped being willing to fight and die for it's causes. So when will immigrants stop becoming watered down and the balance flips and soon Westerners, with their decaying culture disappears?
So, do we revive the Socialist Nationalist ideology and fight and die to preserve our way of life? Is it even worth preserving now? Are we so gone on the teeth that we should accept voluntary euthanasia and take the 'beautiful death' rather than wait until we are bought onto the platform, knelt down in front of the guillotine and allow the subjugated have their revenge? I don't know. That's my motto, I don't know.
It just feels like you can't understand people (obviously, I can't speak German), maybe you need to be born and raised to actually understand where all these different people are coming from. The expats, the experts are patronising, along with the passport stamp collectors. They are obviously holding the knowledge of the country in question, but even then they're not involved, they seem more like long term lodgers. EX (out of) and PATRIA (homeland) is the term they themselves choose, so they are not part of the community are they? It still identifies you as a foreigner, an outsider, a gai-jin.
It's that feeling of helpless angst that's the worst. Is it better to just not care? You ask with so little tact, you're an embarrassment because of this, so HOW do you learn? All I want is to learn which in itself is offensive. A white middle-class Australian has no concept of, I want to say culture. That's it, Australia has no culture of it's own. That bullshit of "multiculturalism" is a joke, it's a miniature less overt Balkans (again, what do I know actually fucking know about the Balkans?) of cultures living in one area, where the immigrants' cultures are watered down by each successive generation so that eventually their children are stuck with the listless masses in an angst ridden limbo where they no longer know who they are. This is compounded in the teenage years, but one day you leave that, sure in your cultural identity. But identity of fucking what?
Laid back and relaxed are labels for ignorance and most importantly apathy. I'm feeling like I believe in nothing, fundamentally. Not as in a vacuum of cultures but indeed the complete opposite; I am bombarded by examples of life, of cultures, of circumstances but I feel nothing for them. I can't feel authentically because I don't understand their context. Do we need some form of conflict to shape our identity? For fuck sake, we are at war right now, but the real effect doesn't reach our shores. In a very self-absorbed way, I admire the modern martyr in that they at least believe in SOMETHING (For the record I'm not just talking about Islam instigated attacks on the west). Regardless of whether their causes are admirable, well founded or justified; it's the act itself of committing to a cause to that extent I respect and search for (though I would not go so far as to say that they are selfless acts, I think the opposite would be overwhelmingly true)
But how self indulgent is that?! People have to die so that I grow a little bit as a person? Please. What is the alternative? Is there an alternative? It seems that identities are fertilised in the blood spilt in this search/clash of identities. What do I do? Read literature and travel western countries?
We live in a civilisation where the youth are promoted as 'the most important resource' which breeds self-absorbed, self-indulgent, shit head little 'individuals'. Well, civilisations rise and fall, their demise begins as they start to slip into indulgence and decadence. The Western Empire is on it's slide into destruction. The Roman Empire eventually met it's end as it became inundated by immigrants and the original citizens stopped being willing to fight and die for it's causes. So when will immigrants stop becoming watered down and the balance flips and soon Westerners, with their decaying culture disappears?
So, do we revive the Socialist Nationalist ideology and fight and die to preserve our way of life? Is it even worth preserving now? Are we so gone on the teeth that we should accept voluntary euthanasia and take the 'beautiful death' rather than wait until we are bought onto the platform, knelt down in front of the guillotine and allow the subjugated have their revenge? I don't know. That's my motto, I don't know.
He's back in action (apologies all round)
Well, did anyone expect any less of me? I've got about a week left, and this is my second blog AND it's on another account because I've forgotten my old password and user name. Rest assured I've still been writing stuff and if I don't post it up, I'll definitely get it out to anyone who may be interested (as much as it could be so very riveting for anyone actually reading this)
Anyway, I'll start with some of the latest stuff I've written and then add stuff arbitrarily, so don't expect it to follow any logical order. Again, did you expect any less?
Anyway, I'll start with some of the latest stuff I've written and then add stuff arbitrarily, so don't expect it to follow any logical order. Again, did you expect any less?
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